The Hack To Forgiveness

July 1, 2020 | Written by Monica Bey

Why do people think forgiveness is so important? Is it just because it’s the “right thing to do,” or is there some other bigger reason?

What is forgiveness? What or who are we forgiving, and for what? Let me answer all of this and more.

First, I don’t believe it’s necessary to forgive. That’s a bold statement, but let me explain. The act of forgiving is centered around the other person or circumstance that offended you. Focusing on the other person takes the power away from you and puts it in their hands.

I say that you should forget “forgiveness” and focus on letting go. Letting go of negative effects the situation had on you brings the focus back on you where it belongs.

The point of forgiveness is that by going through the process of forgiving another person, you release the negative attachments to the trauma they caused. Thereby, you free yourself from the chains of emotional negativity from the situation with them, but because this is about the other person, it takes a lot of time and effort to get there.

Some people never do.

If you’re making it about them, what they did will always be the focus. How can you let go of something that you keep focusing on?

Why not just cut to the chase and release the attachment attachments? Focus inward and let go. It’s really about you anyway. You need to let go of negative emotions so they can stop affecting other areas of your life.

Resentment, emotional trauma, anger and unworthiness are all negative emotions that are actual energies that sit within the body. These energies can affect your total wellness. So, by holding onto them, you only hurt yourself in the long run.

Below are effective ways to release these emotions and detach from the trauma:

Understanding that you need to take your power back and not allow yourself to continue to harbor these negative emotions.

1. Look for the lesson. Everything happens for a reason, so what was the purpose of this happening in your life, and how can you use this experience to move yourself forward? If you can’t see it now, have faith that it will be revealed to you later because it always does. This will help you focus on the positive of the situation and not the negative.

2. Create a ritual to release negative energy. Depending on your faith, use whatever processes you have (prayer, meditation, offerings, candles, deities, etc.), and give it up to your higher power or the universe with the notion that you can’t change the past but you can make sure you do not carry this into your future. This works very powerfully.

3. Following these steps will empower you to the realization that you are always in control of what emotional and mental attachments you carry with you through life. Never allow that to be in the hands of anyone outside of yourself. It’s not about them. It’s about you.